Okay, after this episode, for sure, start reviewing comp lit.
Need to sleep at 10? Stop computer at 7. Come on...
On the other hand, a weird dream. A nightmare where I...didn't kill someone, but sliced their forehead off and hurt him considerably. It was Taeyang-- guess because I was listening to Wedding Dress before I slept. But he didn't... I don't know. There was no just cause for it? I had a cause up until I did it, but until I was giving judgement on why, I couldn't say it.
But he didn't press charges? And was still popular.
Even stranger, I started to become infatuated with him. Not yet but started.
Anyhow. I woke up, it was a nightmare, I had mutilated someone with an unspeakable, and perhaps nonexistent reason.
OKAY. Enough feeling guilty. Feel the valiance of Eliwood and Hector you so are addicted to at the moment and keep your word.
In other cases, what some people look for is not thought, but emotions expressed. The stronger the emotions, the more enjoyed. But thought it not looked for. They look for glimpses of the emotional. Seek only the emotional, and perhaps limited thought processes.
Honestly, at the moment I want to say: that really disgusts me. Why limit the human potential to something so animalistic? Where is the expanse of the mind revealed through conversation like that? Can they not reach that point?
And if they could but choose not to, why not?
Is this because they don't think or they don't want to think? Or only because they don't want to think at that moment?
Comment on music: This is what Sunday mornings are about, really.
So came out of the shower late, and my mother asked me whether I had anything to say, since last night she was exhausted and couldn't talk, and I said I can't just sprout out stuff on the spot.
Regardless we chatted until 5 something into the morning, and I read the Assassin book 1 Victor lent me. On his half-right shots, this one was right, I was finishing it in a rush. Now I'm through a part of the book, the first "part" as much as I can see, where the boy becomes an apprentice finally.
Good of it to keep me on tenterhooks like that.
So last time I checked, the clock said 6:30AM
And...I think the alarm sets off at 6:45, but I think I woke up thinking it was a heck of a long time, but I fell asleep again until Priscilla called my cellphone. Haha~ And that was 11:10 AM or so? Woke up now and then to set off my iPod and stuff. Haha
Anyhow, the crunch of this is not to record my day so much as my mother and I's talk.
One is that she is worthy of learning of. I know I learned this before, but these talks between her and I are rare, and only starting because I've grown older. This is because of her way of teaching is not to tell kids everything, and with her own children of course she would act on her beliefs. Not that father followed this, so obviously for years I would think similarly to dad but not mom.
Anyhow, a little bit of frustrations against--seriously-- father's laziness. And a bit on his weakness at his job right now.
However, she is really over it. Dad is more than well-grown, so she wouldn't teach him anymore "this is his life" mentality. She focuses on the positive...
This is wise, I am sure. I must simulate that frame of mind.
Another on her eagerness to learn science of astronomy. That was cute. I think I should teach her some astronomy once I get my textbook out. I wouldn't mind at all. Or whatever, history? Classics?
Two, let's see... another thing is regarding my laziness. I just have to get out of it, not that cold merciless voice exactly--maybe in the shows I learned it from it came out colder than it is. But a bit of steel with yourself is necessary. Follow that voice, and it means well. Voice, mean well, be a bit more understanding.
Another is regarding my inferiority complex being Priscilla's roommate. Just remind yourself she was brought up in Hong Kong, and that does make a difference. Not the reason, of course, but it makes a difference. Socially and academically. And I wouldn't be her for a million dollars, of course I knew that before, but there has to be reason for that right? Reason is, obviously, I love my life.
Yes, realize Karen, you love your life actually. So stop putting on the mask you hate it, because that really makes you consciously hate it.
Some on health, the thing regarding washing your hair and swimming. Go to the gym in the morning and wash and wait a few hours for your hair, basically.
I have a feeling I'm missing the crunch here...
Ah! Right, the thing about volunteer work. I think I really need that helping people happiness, because when I heard it and absorbed it analytically, I really responded well with it. I believe she was correct in saying
Well, got to rush out. Maybe edit later. Going out at 12:29.